Who’s your Daddy?

This is dedicated to the one I love.

It’s Father’s Day weekend and that special day to celebrate our Dads, Granddads, Stepfathers and those incredible gentlemen who have made a positive influence in our lives.

My father died when I was 28 in the early 80’s, so unfortunately I have spent more than half my life without my dad. I love reminiscing about times we had together and how being with him made me feel safe. I was certainly daddy’s little girl and developed many of his qualities like his strength and honesty and of course being a NY Yankees fan. I may have even picked up a few of his bad habits, (I did). I certainly didn’t inherit his love for ketchup sandwiches or his hatred of cheese. I just didn’t understand how anyone could not love cheese. He drank milk, ate ice cream, etc. When I asked him, his sugarcoated answer was a puzzle for me to put together with age and time.

When he joined the Navy at age 17, he was sent off to fight in the Korean War. On a battleship for months his meals consisted mainly of government issued cheese. He had obviously had his fill. War brought lifetime physical and mental injuries and the death of friends and foes. It all mentally tasted like cheese. 

Happy Fathers Day to my dad Leo, you did your best and gave your love. Thank you for teaching me to be the strong person I am whether I want to be or not! I love you today and forever.

I certainly cannot write a Fathers Day blog without mentioning my own father above, however this blog is for my husband, father to my two sons, stepfather to my daughters and step-grandfather to our grandchildren.

Twenty-five years ago he entered my life and inherited an instant family. Never once has he ever said to me, those are your kids, not mine. He stepped up and helped. He has always been there when anyone needs him without question.

He has raised two boys in the modern dad way, getting up in the middle of the night for feedings or a crying baby, changing diapers, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, taking days off when they were sick, and working countless hours to make sure they are financially cared for and also for the big one, paying for their college education.

After all that you might say, what did I do? We did it together. We made a pact, a marriage, set a parenting plan and needless to say, I was extremely fortunate that he kept his part of the bargain.

Think about it, anyone can be a “father”. But what type of person makes a Father in the true sense of the word? A father helps determine the health of the family’s relationships, which is carried on to the child’s adult life. I will argue that the father has a strong influence on society as a whole. The absence of a father affects children and the adults that they become.

We hear so much about the importance of mothers in children's lives and many people even consider it the mother's exclusive role to raise the children. But is this really true?

Through the way we live our lives and treat others, fathers influence the lives of the entire family. A father cannot be physically or emotionally absent from the family. They are role models and set examples through their relationships with their children and the children's mother (partner) and how they will function in the world.

Sons learn to be men from their fathers and how to treat women or anyone else. Fathers teach daughters to be respected and give respect and exactly what they should expect from a lifetime partner.

In a nut shell, a good father is nothing more than DAD.

To my wonderful husband Darrin and all you Dads out there, Happy Daddy Day. Thank you for being present in your children’s lives and creating a better tomorrow for their future.